Juliet at her cousin, Rebecca's wedding in January 2007, before her condition started to deteriorate

Anorexia wants me to disappear
It wants me to be stunted and silenced
It wants me to age prematurely
It wants me with nothing in my life other than it
Anorexia wants me to shut up and obey and suffer alone
It wishes me harm, hurt and darkness
No light, no life
It presumes that I have no mind and that I am stupid and naïve
It feeds off my brain and my body and wants me dead
It will do anything to achieve its goal. It lies, manipulates, morphs and mutates
It talks to me constantly and does not give me rest
It promises everything I have ever wanted, but in seventeen years it has only taken things away from me
I am a hostage and no one knows where I am.

- Juliet Williams, May 2007

update

4 March 09

Hi everyone. You probably wonder what I am up to. Well I'm back in Caliifornia after several months in NZ recovering and feeling quite good.

I've been to an amazing Monte Nido retreat and am now working on a material for a documentary. I am also being interviewed for a doco for Russian TV.

My hope is to represent the eating disorder community, to help the media, schools and doctors understand what an eating disorder is really about. I've talked to the New Zealand Mental Health Comission, and now am talking to people in the US.

On Sunday the 8th of March at 12.10pm New Zealand time, I an featuring on a Radio New Zelaland show called Spectrum. It is 26 minutes long. If you would like to listen live, go to www.radionz.co.nz. Go to "National" and then "play live."

If you are in New York this will be on Saturday 7th March at 1810pm.
If you are in Los Angeles this is on at 1510pm on Saturday 7th.
If you are in the UK it is on at 2310pm on Saturday 7th.
If you are in Melbourne Australia it is 9.10am on March 8th.

The program is available as a pod cast after the show.

I'd love to know what you thing about it.

Eat-Love
Juliet

6th October08

Juliet is currently not having treatment as she is making some progress towards recovery. We cannot thank enough, the many people who have helped by donating so generously towards her treatment. It is fair to say that without your help she may not be here today. She is working on her future plans. Please do not donate any more, now, but we thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your generosity.

Later we will use Juliet's charity to raise money and awareness for the treatment of eating disorders.

4th August 08

Since leaving Monte Nido, Juliet has been continuing with therapy, her dietician and psychiatrist. She does need more help with eating support and there is a facility in Santa Monica that can assist with that, so we would very much appreciate any donations to help facilitate that. It really is crucial in her recovery.

I have just come back from visiting Juliet and her treatment team and she wishes you to know that she continues to be so grateful for your support and one day wants to help others with eating disorders.

4th April 08

Please pray for Juliet and all those who suffer from eating disorders at 4pm, (NZ time) on every Sunday.

Irina Ratushinskaya, the Orthodox heroine and poet, was a political prisoner in the U.S.S.R. She suffered this punishment for having interceded for certain fellow prisoners who were being harassed by the authorities. After three and a half years of imprisonment her health was severely undermined by lengthy periods of solitary confinement in near freezing temperatures.
Even in the harsh conditions of imprisonment Irena continued to write poetry, scratching out several hundred poems on a bar of soap, committing them to memory, then washing them away.
The following poem she wrote when she was released. It celebrates the fact that it was the people who prayed for her and the other prisoners, that sustained her faith and spirits. As you can see, she always knew when the prayer chain was praying for her.

Believe me, so it happened often:
In solitary confinement on a wintry night
Suddenly an embrace of warmth and happiness,
And a note of low would sound.
And then I sleeplessly know,
Leaning against the ice cold wall-
Now, now they are remembering me,
They are begging the Lord for me.
My dear ones, thank you
All, who remembered and believed in us
In the cruelest prison hour.
We, surely, could not have
Gone through all from end to end,
Not bowing our head, not faltering,
Without your lofty hearts
Illumining our way.

People who suffer from any type of mental illness are prisoners and I, of course, think particularly of all those who suffer from eating disorders.

For over four years, Simon and I have been praying together at 4pm, every Sunday for Juliet, in particular, but also for all those with eating disorders. We pray for her and the others to recover and to be able to experience joy, at last freed from the horrible disease that has kept them prisoner.

We would very much appreciate it if you would do the same, praying at 4pm every Sunday. I believe our combined prayers will be powerful.

Thank you
Lynn and Simon Williams

18th March

Juliet is now living in an apartment, close to the new Monte Nido facility at Malibou Lake. Monte Nido has set up treatment for her in the community with many of the same health professionals she had at Monte Nido. She is 5 minutes walk away from the new Monte Nido. She will continue to go there for Family and Group therapy and support. Meanwhile she will see her psychiatrist, doctor and dietician, but at different venues. She has a new therapist because that's the rule when you leave Monte Nido and she will see her 3 times a week. She will also join the girls from the transition house Bella Mar, for some meal outings and she will be very closely in touch with Monte Nido, and they with her.

Any money you donate will go towards her treatment, for which Monte Nido has set up a special account.

Sadly, we were not financially able to keep her at Monte Nido, but we hope this new plan will provide a good alternative in the meantime.

Thank you all for your efforts, kind words and generous donations. We continue to be overwhelmed by peoples' goodness.

More money desperately needed!

24th February

You may have seen the latest story in the Sunday Star Times 24th February. Juliet has made progress, but still has a long way to go to recover. As Juliet says,

"Dealing with Anorexia is a minute by minute task, and it is every minute in every day".

We watch this and we know it is indescribably painful.

All the donated funds have now been used for Juliet's treatment and we are desperately trying to raise enough to keep her at Monte Nido. If that isn't possible we still need funds to keep her in the community, close to Monte Nido for support and Group Therapy. They will organise her therapy, dietician, psychiatrist and medical care near by.

The miracle we hope for though, is that she can stay at Monte Nido longer, where she needs to be, to complete her treatment. This is the task she set out to do, with the help so many of you gave.

---

Juliet says,

"I feel like I can finally breathe and start focusing on the real stuff, this is where it starts. I can at least start thinking about a future and passions and all the other stuff I haven't been able to think about. I just pray it is not too late. Thank you so much for being patient with me and all your hard work. I am sorry you and every one else has had to go through this. If I can learn to be in the world this way I have a chance, there are so many things that are going to come up now that I am more free of the weight piece and I know this is just the start".

The tragedy is that there is only money to take her through to the end of February. Unless more donations come in the horrible irony will be that just when Juliet seems to have broken through the barriers to be able to move ahead, her treatment will have to stop.

---

Donating Online

It is now easier to donate as you can do it online whether you are in Greymouth or Rio De Janeiro

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A Visit to the Mountain Nest

We went to California from the 10th to the 20th December to take part in Family and Individual therapy sessions with Juliet. It was exciting to see that Juliet was making good progress, but still needs more time to make a complete recovery.

I had been to Monte Nido before, so had experienced the nurturing that goes on there, but for Simon it was an eye opener. He was so moved by the spirutuality of Mountain Nest (the translation of Monte Nido). It truly is a sanctuary, nestled in the mountains. We were bowled over by the dedication of the staff, who go well beyond their job descriptions in treating their clients. There are only 6 young women, the clients and 20 part and full time staff. Their energy level is high and the atmosphere they create is positive.

Carolyn Costin, the director, is truly inspirational and is regarded by many as the best eating disorder specialist in the world. The world turns on its axis when she enters a room.

While we were there we met other parents who were lovely people and of course we were able to give each other support. They had come from other parts of the United States. None had come as far as we had. We took part in group sessions with them and the girls. We were touched by every one's openness and desire to help others. This was true for both the young women and their parents. We had a beautiful meal together, created by their cook, Annie. This of course was very hard for the clients, but conversation was beautifully directed by one of the therapists, which took attention away from eating.

There were high moments and sad moments, but we felt no doubt that Juliet is most definitely in the place which gives her the highest chance of recovery.

We had to re- mortgage to go there, but we know it was the right thing to do. It was a healing experience for us all.

We do thank again, all of you who have so kindly donated money to help Juliet be there.

We are at the stage where we need to raise money for her continuing treatment. There is a facility to donate here on the website or you can just go into any Westpac branch and donate in the Saving Juliet account.

Our best wishes to you all
Lynn and Simon Williams

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Variety show video snippet (last ten mins of the show)

Progress

Juliet has now been at Monte Nido for six weeks. She is fighting hard to recover and making progress. Her therapist says she is amazed at Juliet's tenacity. All the team at Monte Nido are working hard to help her.

Juliet is very grateful for all the love and support, both financial and emotional, which she has received. It makes her more determined to recover and buoys her up in the very low moments.

Keesha, her therapist says it will be a few steps forward and then one back, but progress is being made. Keesha said it will take a long time.

Simon and I have gone into the second phase of fund raising. You can now donate on line via secure credit card here. Simple enter you name and details and you will be taken to the DPS payment page whre you can enter your credit card details.

Juliet, Simon and I thank all of you who have helped us. We have been utterly overwhelmed by your kindness.

Wonderful Email

"Juliet although we have never met I think about you every day. Your poem is absolutely how it is. I know as when I read it I immediately went to those years of manipulation and imprisonment my anorexia and bulimia dealt. I feel your struggle to grasp the swaying silhouette of hope. It is there though Juliet. It, blows gently awaiting for you along with those assisting and loving you. There is a life, there is joy, there is peace when the demon goes. The fear of letting go of the paradox that is your best friend and yet the first to back stab you is intense. I send you my energy as you recover. Go well beautiful woman. - Warmly , Sarah "

Happy Birthday Juliet, 24th August

Happy birthday Juliet! 29 today. Not the happiest of birthdays perhaps, but this is to be the last of her birthdays, where anorexia calls the shots. Next year, well, won’t that be wonderful?

The battle begins

Juliet is now at the Monte Nido Treatment Centre in Malibu, getting the care she deserves and needs. The re-feeding process is just the beginning. The eating disorder will fight every step of the way to stay in charge in Juliet’s head. Right now Juliet is already feeling that this will be a terrible struggle. The pain, she says, is unbearable. The Monte Nido people understand this. They, as recovered sufferers, are the best ones to work with Juliet, to support her and to succeed with her. She must trust them to take her on the journey to health. This is why Juliet will need to stay at Monte Nido for maybe eight months. It takes time to crush the anorexic virus, especially one so long established.

STAC mufti day

The college, where Simon teaches television, has raised almost $NZ9,000 in all sorts of ways. Purple Mufti Day video is here, giving a glimpse of a school mobilised to wear purple, Juliet’s special colour, for a day. A rock concert with 8 bands has just been held at the school. Video of it will be on the site shortly. Two talented musicians busked outside a Christchurch supermarket in the freezing cold last weekend to raise money for a young woman they don’t even know. The college’s head of art has donated a painting which is currently on the auction site Trade Me. Other delights are attracting bids there too.

Benefit Concert

Have a look at the photos of the concert taken by Juliet’s cousin Martyn. Clayton and Aidee should be very proud of organizing such a successful event, full of such love and good wishes, on the eve of Juliet’s flight to the US.

Money!

We have managed to pay for Juliet to start her treatment at Monte Nido, but now the big job begins. We must find a benefactor, someone who has money, who wants to help a wonderful young woman back to health. Somewhere out there is a person who has always wanted to help a person in serious need, but might not know how to do it. If you are that person, please contact us.

So many people have given so generously, it’s been overwhelming. From small children making and selling food, students going work for others, kids making bracelets, we received a very generous interest free loan, Air New Zealand provided Juliet’s air fares, and a friend paid for upgrades to business class. The crew on the plane had all seen the 60 Minutes story about Juliet. When she left the plane the crew gave her a bone carved necklace. Wonderful!

Credit Cards

Over the next few days we’ll be starting a new facility to help you donate. You’ll be able to use your credit card! We are finalizing this facility, so call back, visit us again very soon.

Fundraiser walk

A hundred people from St Andrew's College walked 10kms around Hagley Park in Christchurch on Sunday 29th July and raised $1500 to Save Juliet. There were parents, students, teachers, non teaching staff, all sorts. The weather was cold but dry and everyone had a good time. A humbling and heart warming occasion.

Variety Concert

The Saving Juliet Variety Show took place on Sunday, August 5 at the Kings Arms Tavern, Newton, Auckland and raised $1700. MC Clayton Carrick-Leslie with Musicians: Andrew Keoghan, Anna Coddington, Aidee Walker and some very special friends! Check out the photos here

Air New Zealand

Thanks to Air New Zealand for supplying the seat and a whole lot of support at the aiport on Monday 6th August..

introduction

Welcome to Juliet’s site. Juliet is a talented actor, producer, designer. We think she could be outstanding.

Juliet in happier times

Juliet’s acted in dozens of plays, has designed and produced major fashion stage shows, has tutored on TV and film courses and has appeared is short films, and had a small part in the Peter Jackson film, “Heavenly Creatures”.

Juliet is seen as “phenomenal” by her most recent acting tutor. As a designer and producer she proved how original and creative she is, by wowing her audiences with shows that have been simply unique.

Juliet, however, can no longer show us how brilliant she is on stage, can no longer breathe her magic on to productions, can no longer guide others towards greatness.

Juliet has been suffering from anorexia for seventeen years. She is not yet 30.

Juliet’s condition has been slowly worsening. She has reached crisis point. If she doesn’t get treatment very soon she will die.

This photo was taken after Juliet's graduation from Monte Nido in 2004. She spent 3 months there.

Juliet lives in New Zealand where facilities for treating eating disorder sufferers are poor. They cannot restore a “chronic” sufferer like Juliet, to health.

We are thus raising money to get Juliet to the Monte Nido Eating Disorders Center near Malibu in California. This renowned clinic is a beacon of hope for Juliet, indeed Juliet knows it is the key to a normal life. She knows, because she’s been there before.

In 2005 Juliet spent 3 months at Monte Nido, and later on, another month. It wasn’t enough time. Progress was made, it seemed like a miracle. But it takes time to destroy the illness, and repair the damage it does.

We had to pull Juliet out after we’d run out of money. This has turned out to be a tragedy that could see us lose our daughter. We, however, are not prepared to let that happen.

As Juliet’s condition worsens by the day, we all know what we have to do. We need to raise a lot of money so we, and the World, can celebrate the life of an outstanding young woman. We are looking for benefactors, for generous loving people who can bring Juliet back from the brink.

Will you help us?